8 Things You Probably Don’t Know About Your Penis

charles-deluvio-730835-unsplashYou’ve most likely spent a lot of time getting to know your pecker. Bologna pony. Meat popsicle. And though you may think you know your penis like the back – or palm – of your hand, we bet there’s plenty you don’t know about your kielbasa. Giggle stick. 100% all-beef thermometer.

For instance, did you know:

  1. Men are Just as Sensitive Down There as Ladies?

Yes, scientific data from Cornell University and Michigan State University (Go Spartans) found that when it comes to touch, there is not much difference between your genitals and a woman’s genitals.

You may already know this, but the most sensitive part of your package is the tip of the foreskin and the frenulum. Google it.

  1. Your Johnson is Really Active at Night

If you were to attach a Fitbit to your salami before you fell asleep (and who’s to say you haven’t), it would show amazing caloric burn all through the night. You’re not only waking up with wood every morning, most men get erections up to five times a night.

  1. Your Chalupa Looks More Impressive Than It Actually Is

Your penis is like the best wing man you’ve ever had. By this I mean it sort of tricks women into remembering your penis as being bigger than it actually is. Yes, more scientific studies can back this up. We don’t know if this can be chalked up to wishful thinking on the women’s part or some weird evolutionary memory blip. All we know is, you can rest a bit easier.

  1. Do Not Read This Next One

Your junk can take a beating. There is a guy in Germany, Rolf Bucholz, who holds the world record for number of body piercings. Of the 453 piercings Rolf has, 278 are on his genitals. Hey, you were warned.

  1. You Can Break Your Boner

No, your penis doesn’t actually have bones. But should it be violently twisted or bent when erect, the tubes that fill with blood to make it hard can burst, and this causes very painful swelling. Roughly one-third of all reported cases stem from intercourse where the partner is on top. Be careful out there.

  1. The Shoe Size Myth

It’s a myth that the size of your shoe is in proportion to the size of your pork sword.
Researchers at University College London apparently had nothing better to do and so measured the penises of 104 men, including teenagers and senior citizens. They found no link. But they did find the average shoe size was 9 and average schmekel size was 5.1 inches when soft and gently stretched.

  1. Your Love Muscle is Not Actually a Muscle

Your penis is not a muscle. It’s more like a sponge that fills with blood when you become aroused and gets, hopefully, nice and long and hard. Once you’ve achieved an erection, the swelling blocks off the veins that normally take blood away from the penis.

  1. On a Scale of One to Four

Your erection can actually be graded like meat, but instead of prime, choice and select you’ve got grades of tumescence – stiffness of your Shwarma. The four grades are:

  • Bigger but not rigid yet
  • Kind of hard but not hard enough to penetrate
  • Firm enough for intercourse, but not rock-hard
  • The motherload: Fully engorged

This erection hardness scale was developed by scientists who were testing the effectiveness of the ED drug Viagra.

romi-yusardi-643823-unsplashAnd speaking of Viagra, if you’ve been having trouble in the bedroom achieving any of these four points, you may not like the idea of taking a prescription medication that comes with some pretty nasty side effects. Plus it’s kind of embarrassing filling your prescription. Why not just wear a shirt that says, “I can’t get a hard-on and all I got was this lousy T-shirt.”

Did you know you can achieve the same results as Viagra but with our Golden Royal Honey? Honey, royal jelly, ginseng and Long Jack combine to give you the hard on you deserve. Plus, you’ll have much more stamina and energy to last all night long.

Our Golden Royal Honey is sure to put a smile on your trouser snake’s face. Try some today.